


Thirteen Reasons Why- Cisco

by WolfKomoki



Series: Thirteen reasons why [1]
Category: The Flash, Thirteen Reasons Why - Jay Asher
Genre: Gen, Implied/Referenced Suicide
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-08
Updated: 2018-05-20
Packaged: 2019-05-03 22:35:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,117
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14579079
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WolfKomoki/pseuds/WolfKomoki
Summary: After Barry Allen's suicide, Thirteen cassette tapes arrive in Cisco's mailbox.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> The flash is owned by the CW. Thirteen reasons why is owned by Jay Asher.

         Cisco walks over to his mailbox to find a strange envelope inside. He blinks. Who on Earth would have sent him a package? Frowning, he brings the package inside and sits on the couch, slowly opening it. Inside were thirteen cassette tapes, with each number written on the front and back of the tapes. The back of tape number thirteen was blank. He grabs the tapes and walks over to the stereo. Luckily, the thing still plays tapes. After putting in the tape, he hits play.

 

Cassette 1: Side A

▶️

          “ _Hello, ladies and gentlemen. Barry Allen here, live and in stereo. No, wait, don’t adjust your… whatever you’re hearing this on. That’s right, it’s me. I hope you’re ready, because I’m about to tell you my life story, more specifically, why my life ended, and if you’re listening to these tapes, then you’re one of the reasons why.” Barry’s voice spoke on the tape._ Barry’s voice was hollow, broken, lifeless, and Cisco felt his heart breaking with every word.

 _"No, I won’t tell you what tape brings you into our lovely little story, that’s no fun. Instead, you get to hear the whole story. Don’t worry my little listener, if you received these tapes then your name will pop up, I promise. Now, why would a dead man lie? Aw, that sounds like a joke. Why would a dead man lie? Answer: because he can’t stand up. It’s okay, you can laugh. It was funny._ ”  Cisco felt sick hearing Barry’s joke. That wasn’t funny, at all.

 

“ _Well, I thought it was funny. Of course, I wouldn’t have handed out these tapes without a little insurance. The rules are simple. First of all, you listen. Second of all, you pass it on. Neither of which, I imagine, will be easy for you. You might ask, why thirteen tapes?_

 _They say there are thirteen sides to every story. When you’re done listening, make sure to be kind and rewind dear listener. After that, your job is to pass it onto the next person on this list. Oh, and number twelve? You can take this tape straight to hell. In case you’re thinking of breaking these rules, know that I did plan for that. I made a copy of these tapes to be handed out to a close friend of mine. Should any of you break these rules, these tapes will be released in a very public manner should it not make it through all thirteen of you. Now, with that out of the way, Cisco Ramon? Congratulations, you’re first on this list._ ” Cisco listens in tears. He’d always blamed himself for Barry’s suicide, and now he had even more of a reason to.

“ _Cisco Ramon, of all the people that I thought of for this list, your name was the first that popped into my head. I know what you’re thinking: Barry, what did I do? You know. You know damn well what you did. You might have remembered a while back, a little thing called Flashpoint?_

_When I ran back in time, my father had just been killed in front of me. I ran back in time and saved my mom, resulting in a new timeline known as Flashpoint. There I had my mom and dad back, until my memories started to get erased. I knew I couldn’t stay there, so I ran back. I had to watch Eobard kill my mother all over again, but did you care about that? No._

_You called me a terrible person for it. You called me a selfish person because I made one decision in a moment of grief. You called me selfish because I tried to get my family back. You even blamed me for Dante’s death, as if I had intentionally messed with the timeline to kill him. It was a fucking drunk driver that killed your brother, not me. I made a decision when I was grieving, but did you care about that? No. All you could do is tear me down everyday for a simple mistake._

_The thing about time travel is, time is able to be manipulated. You know you shouldn’t deviate from the timeline, but you were saving a life here, surely that was an okay reason for time travel? The thing about time travel is, the least little deviation can lead to a cataclysm, taking you, and the entire world with it. It’s a tempting thought, the thought of dying. What good was my life? I don’t have an answer to that._

_You know what really made my blood boil? Finding out about your little stunt. So, let me get this straight, it’s okay when you cause a butterfly effect, but when I cause a butterfly effect then I’m a terrible person? Fuck you Cisco. Well Cisco, that was your tape. Turn this tape over to find out why Wally is one of the reasons._ ”  Cisco sobs.

         “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry Barry.” He speaks to empty air. He sighs and puts in another tape.

 

Cassette 1: Side B

▶️

 

“ _Welcome back. Now, one of three things have happened: You’re Cisco, and you’ve turned these tapes in to the next person, or you’re Wally and you’re wondering why you’re on this tape, or you’re someone else, and you’re waiting for your tape. Your name is on here, I promise. Now, Wally West, it’s your turn._

_Now I know what you’re thinking: how could you be one of the reasons why? Well, sit down, because I’m about to take you on a journey. Remember when you first showed up? You thought that I thought that you were trying to take my family away from you. Did it ever occur to you that you were a stranger? That I didn’t know you from a stick in the ground?_

_How was I supposed to react when you showed up out of the blue? You were a stranger. All I ever wanted was to get to know you, but no, you accused me of trying to take your family. Well, guess what? They were my family first Wally._ ” _Barry snaps._

 

 

 

 

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

         ❚❚

 

 

 

Cisco feels the room get colder as he listens to the tapes. He gets up to check the thermostat, and that’s when he nearly had a heart attack. Barry Allen was in the room with him.

         “That’s impossible. He’s dead. I killed him. I killed him, and I’m so, so sorry.” He says. This isn’t real, this isn’t real. He’s dead.

         “Why didn’t you say this to me when I was alive?” Barry asks, his voice broken. Tears pour from Cisco’s eyes as he walks back to his room and continues the tape.

 

▶️

 

" _You were a total stranger in my life. I'd gotten pretty used to Joe and Iris being there, and now here was this new member of the family that I didn't know yet. And when King Shark busted through our living room, and you called me a coward? Yeah, fuck you Wally. As far as you knew, I was an ordinary human being, not the Flash. What did you expect me to do anyway?_

_Yeah, you didn't know that I was the Flash, but if any normal human being saw a giant ass shark bust through their ceiling, they'd be hiding too. Oh, and let's not forget the day that you had the nerve to accuse me of trying to steal your family like I wasn't part of the family too._

_When I gave up my powers to save you, I thought that finally we could get along, and then you became Kid Flash. Why did you have to have a sibling rivalry with me? Why did you have to be so damn competitive? All I wanted to do was get to know you, and yet you didn't want to have anything to do with me. I don't expect you to cry for me, that would be a pipe dream. Shit, you're probably glad that I'm dead. Well, Wally West, that was your tape. Turn this tape over to find out why John Diggle is one of the reasons."_

 

❚❚

         Cisco listens to the tape in shock. Barry thinks that Wally would have been glad that he was dead? What the _hell_ , Barry! He sighs and puts in the next tape.

 

Cassette 2: Side A

 

▶️

 

" _I know it doesn't sound like it, but I really did love Wally West. He was the brother I never knew that I wanted, but this tape isn't about him. No, this tape is about John Diggle. Now John, I know what you're thinking: Barry, what did I do? Don't worry, I'm getting to that. Do you know what it's like to want to die? No? Well, I'm going to tell you._

_You wake up one day, and the first thought you have is: shit, I really wish I was dead. You know I've thought of every single scenario of how I was going to take my life? Yes, I've thought about it, and if these tapes go out, then obviously I actually did it at some point. Would you look at that? I'm rambling. So, yeah, John. You may have remembered a little incident a little while back known as the Dominators incident?_

_Remember when you found out that you had a daughter named Sara? You were so upset about a daughter that you had never met, and wouldn't remember. So, I just went back and changed things for the hell of it, huh? Did it ever occur to you that I had just lost my father? That I was grieving? That when I was in this new timeline I was losing my memories, and that I had to ask Eobard Thawne to kill my mother over again to reset the timeline? No, of course, you fucking didn't. You were too busy chastising me for a simple mistake. Turn this tape over to find out why the entire Legends team are one of the reasons._ "

         When Cisco listens to this tape, he felt like the biggest asshole. Fuck he’d blamed Barry when he _needed him_ , when he was _vulnerable_. He should have _been there_ for Barry, and instead, he tore him down for months until he jumped off a fucking cliff! Tears pour from his eyes as he puts in the next tape.

 

Cassette 2: Side B

 

▶️

 

" _Welcome back. If you've made it to this side of the tape, then either your tape has already happened, or your tape hasn't happened yet, and you're eagerly awaiting to see what you did to cause me to take my life. Well, if you're the legends, then you've already heard a message from me. Well, my little Legends, you're hearing another tape from me. Like John, this tape is about the Dominators incident. So, let me get this straight, it's okay for you to go back in time and screw things up, but the second that I do that I'm the bad guy? Hypocrite much? Oh, and Sara? You're full of shit. You talk about how you know the implications of going back in time and changing things, and yet your team does it all the fucking time. Do me a favor, and shut the fuck up, all of you. Turn this tape over to find out why Joe West is one of the reasons._ "

 

         Cisco puts his hands through his hair, he hasn’t stopped crying since he listened to these tapes. He’d give anything to go back in time and tell Barry that he’s sorry. He’d give anything to stop him from jumping off that cliff. He puts in the next tape.

 

 

Cassette 3: Side A

 

▶️

 

         " _Detective Joe West, what do people think of when they hear that name? A loving father, a devoted worker, a kind person. At least, that's what everyone else thinks. Do you remember when I was stabbed by Savitar? Because I do. I remember every agonizing second of it. I remember the blade shattering my clavicle, I remember the pain, I remember everything._

_I remember when I woke up you asked if Wally was in pain, but you didn't care if I was in pain. You didn't care that I was in pain. You couldn't lose Wally, but you could have lost me, and you didn't care. All you cared about was Wally, Wally, Wally. Guess I should've expected it though. After all, you did lock me in a cell when I was grieving not even a year ago. Well you didn't lose Wally, but you did lose me. I hope this was what you wanted Joe. Turn this tape over to find out why Iris West is one of the reasons._ "

❚❚

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promise you help is out there. I wouldn't be alive today if it wasn't.
> 
> Albania 127
> 
> Algeria 0021 3983 2000 58
> 
> Argentina (054–011) 4758 2554
> 
> Australia 1–800–273–8255
> 
> Austria 142
> 
> Bahamas 328–0922 / 322–4999 /322–2763
> 
> Bahrain 0097 161 199 188/ 0097 161 199 260 / 0097 161 199 191 / 0097 161 199 334
> 
> Barbados (246) 42 99 999
> 
> Belgium 106
> 
> Bolivia 00 591 4 4 25 42 42
> 
> Bostwana 3911270
> 
> Brazil +55 51 211 2888
> 
> Canada 514–723–4000
> 
> China 0800–810–1117
> 
> Colombia (00 57 5) 372 27 27
> 
> Costa Rica 506–253–5439
> 
> Croatia (01) 4833–888
> 
> Cuba 532 348 14 49
> 
> Cyprus +357 77 77 72 67
> 
> Denmark +45 70 201 20
> 
> Ecuador 593 2 6000 477
> 
> Eqypt 762 1602/3
> 
> Estonia 126 /127
> 
> Fiji (0679) 670565
> 
> Finland 040–5032199
> 
> France +33 951 11 61 30
> 
> Germany 0800 1110 222
> 
> Ghana 233 244 846 701
> 
> Greece 1018
> 
> Guatemala 1–800–999–9999
> 
> Guyana +592 223–0001, 223–0009, 600–7896, 623–4444
> 
> Honduras (00 504) 2558 08 08 /2232–1314
> 
> Hong Kong 2389 2222 /2382 0000
> 
> Hungary (46) 323 888
> 
> India 2549 7777
> 
> Iran 1480
> 
> Israel 1201
> 
> Italy 800 86 00 22
> 
> Jamaica 930–1152 / 1–888–429-KARE (5273)
> 
> Japan +81 (0) 3 5286 9090
> 
> Kenya +254 20 300 0378/205 1323
> 
> Latvia 371 67222922
> 
> Liberia 06534308 –
> 
> Lithuania 8–800 2 8888
> 
> Luxembourg 454545
> 
> Malaysia (063) 928 500 39
> 
> Malta 179
> 
> Mauritius 46 48 889
> 
> Mexico 525–510–2550
> 
> Namibia 61–232–221
> 
> Netherlands 0900–113 0 113
> 
> New Zealand 0800 543 354
> 
> Nicaragua 2311–7361
> 
> Norway +47 815 33 300
> 
> Papua New Guinea 675 326 0011 (Daytime only)
> 
> Peru (00 51 1) 273 8026
> 
> Philippines (02) 8969191 /893 7606
> 
> Poland 52 70 000 /52 70 988
> 
> Portugal (+351) 225 50 60 70
> 
> Russia 007 (8202) 577–577
> 
> Samoa 32000
> 
> Serbia 037 23 025
> 
> Singapore 1800 221 4444
> 
> South Africa 0861 322 322
> 
> South Korea (02) 715 8600
> 
> Spain 0145 900 50
> 
> Sri Lanka 011 057 2222662
> 
> St. Vincent (784) 456 1044
> 
> Sudan (249) 11–555–253
> 
> Sweden (46) 31 711 2400
> 
> Switzerland 143  
> suicide prevention
> 
> Thailand (02) 713–6793
> 
> Tonga 23000 /25144
> 
> Trinidad & Tobago (868) 645 2800
> 
> Turkey 182
> 
> UK & Ireland +44 8457 90 90 90
> 
> Ukraine 058
> 
> USA 1–800–273-TALK(8255)
> 
> United States Crisis Text Line If you are immediately concerned about  
> yourself or a friend, reach out for help: TEXT: 741741 http://www.crisistextline.org/
> 
> Venezuela 0241–8433308
> 
> Zimbabwe (9) 650 00


End file.
